One more sleep and my baby turns 1.

365 days, 365 sleepless nights, more than 2000 breastfeeds, 3000 nappy changes, endless cuddles, an infinite amount of kisses and a love that grows more each and everyday. The first year of parenthood is done. My little baby, that was once curled up in my tummy is now a walking, talking (read: wobbling, babbling) one year old boy as of tomorrow morning. Blink and you'd miss it. 

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This time last year I was packing all my bags for our planned Caesar in the morning. I was nothing but excited, eagerly waiting to find out if we would be having a little boy or girl. We barely slept, lying awake talking about who we would be meeting and what they would be like. One thing we knew for sure though, was that we were a team and we were in this together. In no time at all the doctors held up our little boy, my heart doubled and it's been growing ever since. 

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Motherhood is often met with the negatives, the sleepless nights, the fact your time is never truly yours again and the what not to do's to be a great mum. Postpartum Depression is discussed in depth, and whilst it is such a vital topic, it has often made me feel like I have had to downplay my first year as a mum and to exaggerate the 'negatives'. Well here's my truth about the first year: it's been nothing short of amazing. Hunter is Hunter; he doesn't sleep, barely naps, needs to be rocked to sleep, vomited everywhere for 6 months and I wouldn't change one thing. These aren't negatives. This is just my little boy and he is the most incredible little boy I could have ever imagined. If there was one thing I was meant to do in this life, it was to be his mum. Michael and I went into this planning on following our baby's lead, we had no preconceived ideas about sleep, about breastfeeding, or anything for that matter. Whatever was easier we would do, I just wanted to be the best mum for Hunter that I could be. We continue to take each day as it comes and it's been wonderful. 

I am in awe of this little boy that we are raising. Watching him learn, develop and grow is truly magical. He is curious, cheeky, adventurous, fearless, clever, loving, empathetic, resilient...I could go on for ever. He embodies all the qualities that we want to see in our sutdents at school and I hope that I can foster these qualities even more as he grows.  

He has brought me so much joy and changed my world. Physically my world looks different, but mentally my outlook has changed dramatically. He's taught me how valuable my time is, not to waste it doing things I don't love. Taught me to be brave and trust my instincts even more. He will never know how grateful I am for him! 

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I often wonder how I will ever love another child like this? I am sure your heart finds rooms, but for now this little 1 year old boy is all I need to make me feel complete! Happy birthday Hunter, you wonderful little human! 

Emilly x